Monday, June 18, 2007

I'm a doctor's wife...

OK...I know the title of my blog has been "Experiences of a doc's wife...." for a while, but I'm officially the wife of a doctor and I'm in the process of adjusting to that lifestyle - in a new state no less. I have to say I can't complain about MI so far. The neighbors are all wonderful and Ella and I have already made friends with a family a few doors down and look forward to our friendship growing. The weather has also been pleasant. We've had a few 90+ degree days, but not back-to-back like they are in FL, so it's easier to bare.

But, I will say that I'm having a hard time adjusting to Stephen's new life. I can't really say that it's been bad so far. It's just that we've had him around constantly for a while now and all-of-a-sudden he's busy with orientation and coming home tired (feels like the beginning of medical school again). His first month which officially starts this coming Sunday, he will be on call every fourth day. So, a week from today is his first night on call which means he'll go in Monday morning at 6:30am and not getting off until Tuesday at 12:30pm...and assuming that he doesn't get much sleep at the hospital, I'm sure he'll sleep when he gets home that afternoon and then gets to go right back to work at 6:30am the next morning. Again, this isn't horrible - it could've been a lot worse if he would have stuck with surgery. I could easily be worrying about nothing and I'm sure I am. It's just a matter of getting used to a new schedule. But, I'm starting to lose sleep and I'm having bad dreams. Without getting too detailed they all play on my abandonment issues. They're pretty much the same dreams every night with a little differences, but they are so real and I wake in a panic and then can't get back to sleep. If I do get back to sleep, the dream continues and it just gets worse. I will then think about this dream as if it were real for the rest of the day. I know it's not real of course, but what really bothers me is not the dream, but how it makes me feel...scared, lonely, worried about the future, etc.

I truly feel like I have no one to talk to about this. I have had dreams like this before although never this frequent. I've mentioned them to Stephen and he's getting sick of it because he thinks they're so absured. Yet, what I really need from his is reassurance, not just hearing that I have "nothing to worry about." I can't imagine this going on for much longer. I really feel like I could easily slip into depression or need to seek counseling if this continues. I'm trying to snap myself out of it and realize that I'm just stressing over new situations and circumstances and it takes everyone time to adjust. So....

...I will continue to blog about my new doctor's wife experiences and maybe even share some stories (even though I'm probably not allowed to). All I ask is that whoever is reading this will keep me in their thoughts and prayers or offer any advice you may have. I know it might be hard to understand what I'm talking about or where I'm coming from if you don't know my past and that's OK. I just needed to share my feelings.

Monday, June 11, 2007

Happy 2nd Birthday Ella!

Today my little girl turned 2! Unfortunately, Ella had to spend her birthday in a new town where we didn't have anyone to invite for her party. So, it was the three of us opening presents that our family and friends sent a long with us and a few that we bought her and then we ate cake!! Ella's birthday theme was the Disney Princesses and she new every one! She got a lot of Play Dough stuff, a new kitchen, wooden beads that you string, and some puzzles. She's also going to get a playground in the backyard from Papa, but we haven't had time to get it just yet. Ella also got big girl furniture for her room and and new decorations that I'm sure she'll enjoy.

As for an update...she had her 2 year checkup this past Monday before we left FL and she weighed 24.14oz and is 33" tall. I have yet to look up the percentiles since our ghetto-pediatrician and her office doesn't tell us that! Anywho, we're enjoying talking to her more and more and as loves to have conversations and point out things al the time. She's also starting ask, "why" a little bit and I'm really dreading when she asks it constantly! One thing that's really adorable is when Stephen or I seem to be having a problem or is getting frustrated, she'll say, "What's the matter" (while putting her hand on our chin) and then says, Come here, I'll help you." It's the cutest thing in the world and her enunciation and emotion that she puts into it makes it even better!

As for a Michigan update, we're enjoying a lot so far. Besides the first two days when we were here and the weather was just like FL, it's been in the 70's for highs ever since. I'm loving that! All of our neighbors came by and introduced themselves the first day we were here and they're all very nice! And there are TONS and I mean TONS of kids around and Ella has already made a few friends. We are sure we are going to love this place more and more. I'm just sick of unpacking! When will it end?!?! No seriously, I've already got the kitchen done and our room will be done by tomorrow and hopefully we'll work on Ella's room soon after.

I hope everyone is well and we have a place for you in MI if you ever want to visit!

Saturday, June 02, 2007

Stephen is a doctor!

Just had to let everyone know that my wonderful husband of almost 6 years has officially become a doctor. Stephen graduated from Florida State's College of Medicine yesterday with 47 other graduates and will be starting his pediatric residency on June 15th. I am so very proud of him and looking forward to the new journey we're about to embark on. Thank you for all your well wishes and your support over the past years!

Ella's 23 Month Update

It's May already?!?! We only have a few more weeks left in FL and I'm starting to get really sad, yet excited about our new journey. Ella doesn't know that anything big is getting ready to happen and I'm starting to worry about her adjusting. She was barely one when we moved back to FL last year and I didn't even give it a second thought, but now I'm concerned. We'll definitely make sure her room is put together first and will go ahead and put her crib up just so she's comfortable the first few weeks and then we'll get her new bed and furniture delivered.
As for a real update - Ella amazes me more and more EVERY day. She LOVES counting and can do so up to 20 and she'll even throw a few spanish numbers in there thanks to Dora, but we aren't necessarily teaching her that. She's also got the whole alphabet down, now we're trying to teach her the song to go with it, but that's not catching on very well. One thing new that she does that I absolutely love, is when she wakes up in the morning and comes downstairs, she says, "Morning mom"...and then proceeds to say that to whoever is there whether its the dogs or Stephen. I still have no idea where she picked that up.

Ella still loves the outdoors. She loves to 'mow' with her bubble-blowing mower, she loves her slide and her sandbox and she loves watching the cows in the pasture across our street. Yes, I know it's weird to think we have cows in our neighborhood, but we do. We live in the back of Southwood and there is pasture across the street where cows roam and eat grass twice a day, so we usually catch them early evening before dinner. All of us will miss the cows a lot!
Ella has also remembered her love for water. I was worried early on because she was very timid the first time we took her to the pool, but we've been a few more times and she's back to her normal self. She even started jumping off the wall into the water!!! I was shocked when she started doing that. :) She also learned how much fun the beach is. I can't wait to take her back. She had a blast in the ocean after she realized that the waves weren't out to get her. So, after a few minutes of running away from the waves, she got right in and let them knock her down, but for the most part, she kept her balance really well while the waves went by. She also loves collecting shells. We were trying to get her to build sand castles with us, but she just destroyed everything daddy and I built!

We also took Ella to Disney a couple weekends ago. The last two times she's been she went with her Aunt and cousins, so we were excited to go with her this time. We split the day up between Epcot and Animal Kingdom. Epcot wasn't really for her and the only reason we wanted to go was because we hadn't been in forever and were curious about the new rides, but we only went on a couple ofthe new rides...we'll have to do the Test Track next time. By the time we got to Animal Kingdom Ella was getting tired, but we still had fun. But, I'm looking forward to using up our special passes that we got and take her back to the Magic Kingdom and MGM before we leave FL for good. We'll be getting on that soon after graduation.

Speaking of graduation...I can't believe it's almost here. That weekend will be whirlwind with all the people who will be in town and everything we have going on, but I'm looking forward to it. I'll probably be giving you the next update a few days early due to our moving around the 5th and Ella will be getting her two year check up earlier that week. So, until then, hope all is well and keep us in your thought and prayers as our lives in the next few weeks will be very hectic and changing very quickly!